When my job announced that we would be working from home, I was relieved.
I would no longer have to wake up at 7:00 am and drive 45 minutes to and from work, which meant that I would be saving a ton of money on gas.
Despite my anxiety and my germophobia being at an all time high with hearing more people becoming infected and passing away from the Coronavirus, I tried to find the silver lining with the pandemic (I know, it sounds crazy to use silver lining and pandemic in the same sentence).
I figured with the extra free time I would be having, I would be able to get my life together by cooking more, working out, focusing on my writing and of course saving money.
Man, I was so wrong.
I should have known better than to set my expectations so high, especially during a pandemic.
Even before COVID-19 was a thing, I would tell myself EVERY SINGLE WEEK that this is the week that I’ll get it together, and every week I disappointed myself.
Initially, I was off to a good start. I went to the grocery store for some lunch and dinner staples and cooked every day except weekends.
But then, all that changed when I kept getting bombarded with commercials about supporting local restaurants while sappy music played.
It was like those ASPCA commercials where they show the injured dogs and cats looking all wide-eyed and pitiful into the camera while Sarah McLachlan’s “In the Arms of an Angel” plays.
Like any good person would, I had to do my part and help out my local restaurants.
Plus, there are only so many times you can eat PB&J for lunch.
Sadly, my weekend treats turned into almost daily visits from Door Dash and Uber Eats .
If that wasn’t bad enough, I was also dropping major coins on purses and accessories.
One of my purchases was the Louis Vuitton Pochette Metis in Empreinte Leather.
I know, it sounds pretty stupid to buy a purse right now when we’re all at home.
But, I’ve been wanting the Pochette Metis for years, and I had to get it now before Louis Vuitton raised their prices again and before you judge me, no, I did not use all of my savings on a purse.
The first thing I did when my savings reached a significant amount was pay off almost all of my credit card bills. I also paid a for a few months in advanced on my car note.
When I received my Pochette Metis, it was like a dream come true.
I thought I wouldn’t be able to afford my first Louis until I was at least in my 40s.
It felt so unreal trying on my new bag.
The marine rogue color looked even better in person and gave the bag a classy and chic look.
I knew I made the right decision going for the empriente leather instead of the traditional monogram canvas because the leather and color are timeless.
I like Louis Vuitton’s monogram, but sometimes I feel like it can be too 2006.
I swore after dropping $2,500 for the purse that I would save the rest, but then I thought to myself.
I can’t have a Louis Vuitton purse without a Louis Wallet.
How stupid would I look opening up my Louis Vuitton and busting out a Coach Outlet wallet?
No disrespect to Coach Outlet, but it wouldn’t be on brand with my look.
That’s like if I wore a leggings and slides with my new Pochette Metis.
So, I went back on to the Louis Vuitton website and decided I wanted a long wallet in their monogram print rather than in empreinte because it would be more versatile and cheaper.
I love anything pink and girly so the Clémence wallet with the monogram flower charm caught my eye.
Unfortuantely, the wallet was sold out. So, I headed to Poshmark.
I was able to find the wallet for $100 off the original price.
I didn’t even hesitate to click “buy now” button and afterwards, I checked the Poshmark app every few hours for status update on my order.
After a week and a half, my wallet arrived and looked brand new, but of course, the excitement and anticipation wore off once I received the wallet.
So, then I started to think about how much i’ve been wanting a denim bag lately.
I figured since I still had thousands of dollars left over, that now would be the best time to buy the Louis Vuitton Denim Baggy PM shoulder bag that I discovered on Youtube and have been eyeing on Poshmark for a while now.
I know, buying two Louis Vuitton bags and a wallet all in one month may seem excessive, but I was able to get the denim bag for almost 50 percent off, which if you ask me is a great deal.
My denim Louis arrived in brand new condition, but I was worried about treating the Vachetta strap.
I didn’t want the strap to look all dingy after using it for one year. I also couldn’t wear my Pochette right now because it’s too dressy take to the grocery store. The colors also work better for my fall/winter wardrobe. So, my crazy and impulsive told me that I ended a cheaper throw-around summer bag.
Once again, I found myself wasting time, scrolling through Poshmark for ANOTHER purse.
I ended up with the Mini Bennett Coach Satchel in signature canvas and floral detail to add to my Bennett bag collection.
I kind of felt bad and disappointed with myself for being so impulsive with my money.
My father is an immigrant from Jamaica and my mother grew up with six other siblings.
They were always stingy af with money and tried to drill into my head to always safe my money and not spend it all at one time.
Maybe that’s why my dad always felt entitled to take my birthday, Christmas and sporadic allowance money because in the words of my mother, “he didn’t want me to waste all of my money.”
I guess it’s better to emotionally abuse and control your child than to allow them to blow $30 at Chuck-E-Chesse.
For the first time in my life, I felt like the money I’ve worked so hard for and saved, belonged to me.
I didn’t have to worry about someone stealing it or lecturing me about how I decided to spend it.
Maybe that’s why I went a little crazy and also bought a Coach vintage Willis bag, a LongChamp coin pouch, an embossed Coach dinky bag and a Coach heart applique wristlet.
Or maybe I was just simply addicted to how easy it was to purchase things from Poshmark.
You don’t have to waste time looking for your credit card and then filling out your shipping and billing information because the information is already in your account.
I also got an aderenaline rush when I negotiated prices with sellars and waited for them to respond.
It made me feel like I was at an auction.
The only thing missing was a guy wearing a cowboy hat and talking super fast and banging a gavel before declaring “sold”!
This type of anticipation and excitement was what I was lacking with being in isolation.
Everyday felt like Groundhog Day. The emails that I received saying my package was shipped or when I received a text saying that my Dasher or Uber Eats driver was on the way, gave me something to look forward to.
Now, I’m taking a break from shopping because the Fed Ex driver is really started to get pissed at me.
I swear he bangs on my door like he’s the police and just throws my packages at my front door and leaves.
My bank account is also mad at me and can’t take any more withdraws.
I guess I should have taken my bank freezing my debit card when i made back to back Louis purchases as a sign from God to slow my roll.
But I can’t change the past.
I can only move forward.
Instead of setting these lofty goals and expectations for myself, especially during these stressful and uncertain times, I should just take it one step at a time.
I think a lot of us are feeling anxious and stressed out during this time but take it from me, binge eating and manic shopping will not solve your problems.
They’re just temporary quick fixes in this chaotic and confusing world we’re all living in.